I have no desire to write, I feel bad despite being at home, at his side, I can not feel bad remedy. But do not feel bad that yesterday I spoke so well that hardness is given, nor the times I did feel a complete idiot.
I asked for a word that would define how I felt ... It was so hard! Just a thought? I felt guilty, stupid, wrong. But I felt guilty over all others. Guilty of all the pain he caused, his discomfort, guilty of every stupid idea that was thought and said.
moron ... How did I behave that way? say that, thinking, thought. Can anyone tell me how it might do so? How could I be jealous of a woman? Yes, I know, I know the reason why I'm so ashamed.
settled the issue yesterday and to return has not opened his mouth and pointed me anything or need to. Every time I look at my agreement and I would of slapped, sometimes close my eyes ashamed to what happened, not daring even to think on that topic.
Sorry, I do not know what happens to me, but I can not talk about it, not even thinking about it. Maybe in a time when everything has been natural to expect it but right now I have no desire to continue and again remembering those days.
All I would really, really, is to make sure that I believed. You know it hurts him dañoy fact that he knows how I feel about that yesterday did not seem to ... whatever. I guess I deserve this wretched uncertainty.
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